2012: Challenges and Triumphs

CHALLENGES:

I turned 45 – Though I’ve never given much thought to the “importance” of the number associated with various birthdays, this one got me. For some reason, the several weeks leading up to May 6^th this year were really bothersome. Angst, anxiety, maybe even that mid-life mortality. Thankfully, it’s been great so far; I’ve got almost ½ of 45 left…hope it’s great;

The economy – well I guess nobody’s been left completely unaffected by the slackening of our economy over these last few years. And when DJS lost her position with the URJ – putting aside the many thoughts about the direction of our Reform movement – it ended up putting an unexpected dent in our economy. Like everyone else, we gotta deal with it.

Perspective – sometimes new information comes your way about long-held beliefs and truths that can shake your understanding of self, family and everything else.

Health – mine, thankfully, is fine, as it that of my immediate family. Yet I’ve witnessed too many of my friend, relatives, loved one suffer through the ups and downs of the health rollercoaster. Illness, injury, death – never fun.

TRIUMPHS:

Ben becomes Bar Mitzvah – almost  ‘nuff said. A monumental milestone in his life, and the life of our family – the pride I felt in the time of his preparation a year ago has only been surpassed by the real joy in watching him flourish even more so in the time since. Little Jazz is a great young guy; he’s bright and funny, and truly cares….cares about what or whom? You might ask….yes, cares about it all…

Vered blossoms – it must have been at some point in that period when I was fretting about my birthday, and we noticed something almost magical about Sister Soul. She simply bloomed like a (social) flower. Friends, school, camp, music, art, the kitties – you name it, she has grown exponentially in every conceivable way over the last many months. I can’t wait to see what happens next.

Temple – now in my seventh year with TBE – I have great, deep, wonderful, profound feelings for my community. Like anyone, I may doubt my career choices from time to time; there’s no doubting that I am fortunate to serve a loving congregation that will strive to be even more in this New Year.

Camp – clearly nothing is more important in what I do as a rabbi, nor what we do as a congregational movement, than afford the experience of Jewish summer camping for our children (and for those of us adults privileged to participate as well). No better building block of Jewish identity, self-esteem, and life-long relationships. The role I’ve been able to take on with my fellow faculty colleagues has been an honor – both taxing and tremendously uplifting.

20 years! Deb and I marked our twentieth anniversary a few days ago. And the usual platitudes apply: it’s been so long, yet feels like just yesterday; how did it fly so fast? can you believe we made it this long? I’m not old enough to be married 20 yrs, etc…Wow….all that and then some.

I turned 45 – forget what I said above. As dear ol’ dad likes to remind everyone, “It’s better than the alternative.” Hope you’ll join me for the next 45.

Needless to say, the triumphs far outnumbered and outweighed the challenges. Hope yours did too. More so, may 2013 be the best year yet, for us all.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. VIII: finale, this time around

Because I so enjoy the lightheartedness and fun of Hanukkah, I hate this last night of the holiday. You know, when it's basically *all over*. This week of lights has been full and fulfilling, with great joy and terrible sadness - a perfectly appropriate (and perhaps metaphoric) microcosm of the entirety of Jewish life.

This morning we tried to wrap our heads around and make sense of the tragic shooting at Sandy Hook school in Newtown, CT, as I'm sure many people all over the country tried to do. The great blessing was to address the issues surrounding this incident among a group of caring, intelligent, articulate, and feeling people.

This evening, we took the kids to see the Klezmatics at the DeBartolo Center at Notre Dame. I still think it's kinda funny that one of the most well-known and active Jewish bands would actually have a gig here in SB on the one Saturday evening during Hanukkah this year. It was a great show - wonderful musicianship and an upbeat mood was a great way to punctuate the holiday.

And then, arriving home, we remembered we didn't have enough candles to light the menorah (file under the category of "Hanukkah irony"). I pulled out the Shabbat candles, and the giant *chanukiah* they fit (which I think we got at Crate and Barrel a billion years ago)...and, voila, we kindled and blessed the lights for this final eve.

Miracles and stories recounted, candles lit and songs sung, latkes eaten, dreidels spun, it's nearly time to put Hanukkah 5773 in the container of sacred memories. Thankful for them all.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. VII: There are no words, and then...

At first, there are no words to capture the depth of tragedy, horror and sadness of today's shooting in Connecticut. SHOCK. SILENCE. TEARS.

And then, as the emotions roil over, the words emerge. Slowly, surely, even confidently and with hope:

Saddened, horified, devastated by the tragic events in CT today...can't even imagine what it is for those families and that community to undergo this destructive ordeal. Tonight, as we welcome Shabbat, and celebrate the 7th night of Hanukkah, may every one of us, no matter our background or beliefs, pause to truly consider how we can each be a bearer of light, goodness and compassion in our world which needs healing and love.

For the moment, put aside the coming arguments about gun control and the right to bear arms; don't over-analyze or psychologize those involved. There will be time for that. Now, just hurt, be sad, cry for the innocent lives that were taken today. Be human, be a mensch - tomorrow we'll fix the world.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. VI: a tin-full of memories

Perhaps even more significant than the famous Maxwell House Haggadah for Passover - which became one of the most significant American Jewish holiday tools of the 20th century - is the much less well-known, but similarly important "Maxwell House Coffee Tin Dreidel container." When I was young, and began collecting the dreidels I received at various family and Temple Hanukkah events, I asked for some sort of box or something in which to keep them. Trusty ol' dad (well, not so old back then of course!) ran down to the basement, and pulled out of a pile of stuff a wonderful, empty coffee can, lid and all.

I put those few dreidels in it, and over the years, as I got more at each Hanukkah celebration, the tin became fuller and fuller - and actually at one point *overflowed* so the cover no longer fit. And as I tip it over tonite, spilling the many tops on our kitchen table, I am reminded very visually of a host of Hanukkah eves gone by: the times spent with the chavurah to which our family belonged for a few years; the year we gave goodies, gifts and necessities to a newly-arrived Russian Jewish family (including a bunch of dreidels); the Hanukkah that began just after Grandma died; lighting the menorah the week of our wedding, and then years later at my nephew's Bar Mitzvah; the many Festival eves with Ben and Vered, and of course so many more.

May every turn of YOUR dreidel spin a new sacred memory.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. V: lighting it up with the kids

It's the 5th nite of Hanukkah. And it's Wednesday - which means we get to light up the menorah with our Religious School kids. Before the blessings and candles, I asked the students to tell me what they thought the significance of this night 5 means. They came up with great responses: "there are 5 days in the school week"; "there were 5 people in class today"; and, most touchingly (the more I've thought about it), "there are 5 fingers on each hand." Hmmmm...5 fingers...with which we can reach out to one another, embrace, hold up during times of blessing as well as challenge. A simple sweet idea for this otherwise uneventful night of joy.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. IV: the rollercoaster of life

Hanukkah is a lighthearted time of joyous celebration. And yet, even the uplift of this season cannot interfere with, or stop, the tide of life carrying on...

Today, I had the honor to officiate at the funeral of a dear long-time member of our congregational family. This was a difficult occasion for many, of course - but not because it was unexpected. Quite the opposite. This person had been such a remarkable long-term survivor of a variety of serious medical conditions, that her closest family and friends had simply come to understand that she would never die. Even when faced, as she was a host of times, with the most severe diagnoses, she always made it through. Of course, ultimately, everyone's time is limited...

So for this woman who was a loving and loved mother and grandmother, lifelong teacher and student, friend and companion - this afternoon's gathering was a beautiful tribute with reflections and anecdotes, highlighted by sweet, witty and carefully crafted offerings from her children - which I believe she would have greatly enjoyed.

We are reminded of yet another vital lesson from our tradition, even when experiencing the intermingled highs and lows of life, its simchas and sadnesses inseparable: to embrace the moment, every moment - as there's a big difference between *dying* and dead.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH pt. III: don't neglect the little things

Hanukkah is traditionally considered a "minor" holiday: it doesn't have major theological significance; it doesn't have the *weight* of religious rituals; it is not rooted in the Bible. It HAS become a major "to-do" for the American Jewish scene - as we've developed such nice customs, music, foods, and have used this occasion to enhance our commitment to creating a sense of joyful community.

And maybe that's just it. The *meaning* of this festival - usually connoted as being about historic Jewish independence, Jewish pride, standing up for who we are facing overwhelming odds against us, and so on - the meaning is really the reminder to appreciate the little things, the subtle things, that most of us usually take for granted.

The small words of support and kindness, the moments of understanding, sympathy, and embrace - THESE are the real gifts of Hanukkah (or any season). All of us are exposed, I know, more often than we'd like, to episodes of lousy treatment by others, disrespect and disregard even from our supposedly closest friends and colleagues. So to are all of us prone to act in such disingenuous, careless, perhaps horrific and derogatory ways toward those around us - though we might profess the horror of these offenses. 

Maybe the lesson of this Festival of Lights is that in order for us to each be a light of goodness and compassion in the world, first we must each lighten up, and remember that most of the issues that vex us are (as a friend calls them) "1st World problems", and mainly petty or insignificant after all. Once we recognize this very fact, perhaps we can stop blaming others for what annoys us, and learn to give thanks for all the good stuff we really have, and we really are.

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. II: *Season* of Lights

Last night, for the first eve of Hanukkah, I dutifully made a big batch of latkes (which, by the way, for a guy who doesn't really like them, I make really well). After dinner, I left my big, trusty cast iron pan on the stove, with the last remnants of the oil in which we fried the potatoes.

And of course, I forgot about the pan overnight. Following a busy Sunday, I finally got back to the kitchen after 4 p.m. today. "OOPS! Gotta clean the pan!" With a little hot water and a quick wiping out, my beloved cast iron monster is in better condition than ever. Yes, these items are actually quite easy to maintain for a life-time of use. Yet (nes gadol hayah po) perhaps another miracle of Hanukkah oil occurred right here.

So - you ever need to season (or re-season) a good ol' cooking implement? Easy - just make some latkes.

CHAG SAMEYACH!

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH, pt. I: Little Jazz about to turn 14

YEMEI HA-CHANUKAH CHANUKAT MIKDASHEINU

Thoughts for these days of Hanukkah 5773

Of all things I remember quite clearly a meeting of the CCAR I attended 14 years ago today. It was the monthly gathering for the New York area region of Reform rabbis - usually a handful to a dozen of us showed up at a given session, yet a few hundred joined together at HUC-JIR for a presentation on the current draft of "Principles of Reform Judaism" to be ratified at the coming spring Conference convention. And this is of course not why I recall that day.

After a lengthy morning discussion, Deb and I accompanied a senior colleague, Rabbi Norman Kahan, to lunch, walking together the many blocks from the College to a favorite middle eastern restaurant, Rectangles. A funny sight we must have made while making our way across the city: Norman, who's bad hip necessitated using a cane to assist his affected gait, and Deb who looked like she was 10 months pregnant.

Needless to say, Ben arrived the next day. There are those (like Deb) who believe that such extensive walking induces labor. And really, who's to argue?

Now with the onset of Hanukkah 5773/2012, so too do we look at celebrating Little Jazz turning 14. Hanukkah 1998 included our family gathering for his B'rit Milah; this time around should be less traumatic for all involved. May it yet be a time of being with loving family and friends.

CHAG URIM SAMEYACH - wishing you a Festival of Lights filled with peace, tasty goodies, and much love.

Bigotry, in all its forms, is intolerable

I'm proud that my kids have been exposed to anti-bigotry and anti-bullying programs in their school, at camp, and of course in our conversations at home. Part of the work of eradicating hatred is cultivating love, inclusiveness, and acceptance. This is a major part of our religious tradition, and of course a better element of the American heritage as well. And yet - beginning with what I heard from a friend at a birthday party over the weekend, and then amplified by a story on tonight's evening news:

 

Reports of hate-oriented graffiti/vandalism in Granger, IN.

As a rabbi in the local community, as president of our United Religious Community (the URC is our local interreligious organization, dedicated for more than 40 yrs. to building bridges of understanding and cooperation across religious and cultural lines), and more so as a concerned citizen, I call upon ALL good people everywhere to share that such intolerance and bigotry will never be condoned, and that any perpetrators of this kind of behavior will be held responsible for their actions. 

Please share this message, and stand up and speak out for justice, wherever you live.

Attitude of Gratitude - Thanksgiving 2012

It's Thanksgiving - when we overeat, hang out with family/friends, and generally gorge ourselves on the abundance we usually take for granted. Many of us enjoy living in a life of plenty, of excess, and even as we *try* to be mindful of those (even within our own midst) who are in need - it is so far outside our comfort zone/off our radar screen - it is truly difficult to understand the plight of our brothers and sisters who really don't have enough. 

It's not just in "Third World" nations that people suffer from lack of food, clothing, shelter, necessities...unfortunately such impoverished conditions have emerged throughout our blessed American society.

Let us commit ourselves anew to working toward a just society that cares for those in need - whatever those needs might be. As we give voice on this day for our "thanks" for all that we know in our lives - let us express our *ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE* by truly making a difference in the world - not merely be claiming to love humanity, more so by loving our fellow human beings.

Happy Thanksgiving - may this be a time of greater peace, compassion and love for us all!

Celebrating TBE's "Teen J.A.M." on National Philanthropy Day

Over this past year, DJS and I have been privileged to work with the high school students of TBE as on of the pilot sites for the URJ-sponsored "Teen Philanthrophy" project. Through it, our young people have been studying, exploring and implementing a variety of philanthropy-related topics from social justice and tikkun olam to fundraising and grant writing to request evaluation and donor recognition. It has been a wonderful exposure to the intricate system of philanthropy, which is much more, of course, than simply "charitable giving." And for us, as teachers, it has opened the opportunity to help cultivate a coming generation who will be more philanthropic in their endeavors that ours (my direct peers, that is) has proven to be.

After a general overview of these various items - the students chose four areas of concern that they felt are critical in our community. After putting out a call for RFPs (request for proposals), the teens vetted the applications and ended up making grants of a total of $2500 to two local worthy organizations - what a great way to culminate the initial season of the project.

Today, we attended the annual "Salute to Philanthropy" luncheon hosted by the local chapter of the Association of Fundraising Professionals (AFP) - at which our program, known as Teen J.A.M. (Jewish Agency of Michiana) was recognized for its efforts by receiving this year's Youth Philanthropist award. I am very proud of the work our high schoolers are doing to elevate awareness about important issues, and to be involved in supporting such ideas in real terms.

Just a thought for this difficult Monday of Tday week

This is a time of great concern, anxiety and worry for our brothers and sisters - Jew and non-Jew alike - in the land of Israel. As we hope for a peaceful resolution to the current crisis coming out of Gaza, so too do we voice our support for Israel's sovereign right to defend itself, protect all its citizens, and eliminate any such terror threat it faces.

As Americans, we are enjoying this season of Thanksgiving, acknowledging the many blessings we know in our lives. One of these blessings is of course our obligation to be among those good, caring, compassionate people who work together to make the world a better place. Now approaching our Festival of Light - may we dedicate ourselves anew to the causes of justice, peace and love.

"about whatever inspires me"

Obviously, very little has been inspiring me.
Since the flurry of blog-tivity during Sukkot, not a single post in more than a month.
Halloween, voting, elections, Movember....a big fat NADA.

Guess I need to find some renewed inspiration. Maybe you can help.

Hachnasat Orchim #8 - Sukkot/Simchat Torah 5773

WHAT A MONTH!!! Full, fulfilling, crazed, creative, uplifting, exhausting....the beginning of 5773 has been a wonderful time - our community has outdone itself with a very meaningful set of observances: from S'lichot the week before Rosh Hashanah through the yamim nora'im along with Sukkot and today's festive conclusion of Simchat Torah - this has really been a z'man simchateynu, a time of rejoicing.

And now (hallelujah!) it's OVER. DONE FINIS. I'm wiped just thinking about the energy and activity I've spent over the last 5 weeks. As well as deeply satisfied.

I know the weeks ahead will be just as busy, if not more so. 

Bring it.

Hachnasat Orchim #7 - Sukkot 5773

I got nothing (and sometimes that just simply enough).

"The commandment to dwell in the sukkah is intended to teach us that a man must not put his trust in the size or strength or salutary conveniences of his house, even though it be filled with the best of everything; nor should he rely upon the help of any man, even though he be the lord of the land. But let him put his trust in the One whose word called the universe into being, for God alone is mighty and faithful, and does not retract what is promised."

(Menorat ha-Maor 3.6.1)

Hachnasat Orchim #6 - Sukkot 5773

Now we've reached shabbat chol ha-mo'ed sukkot, the intermediary Shabbat during the festival of Sukkot. This remains a time of reflection, thanksgiving and celebration. Of course, in Jewish tradition, the best way to give thanks for the many blessings we know in our lives is to "give back" by supporting worthy causes, and efforts that will have positive effect in our world.

It is also the first Shabbat of October. Anywhere you look, on any given day, you can surely find that some outfit has declared it to be "national such-and-such day" or "national fill-in-the-blank week"....and yet, there are at least three such named opportunities for us to consider now that it is October: it is National Anti-bullying Month; National Mental Health Awareness Month; and Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Nicely - none of these are frivolous or goofy causes. Bullying is a serious issue in our society today; and let us not think that it is limited to the playground or school-yard - our children ONLY pick up their cues in how to behave toward their peers from their parents and other adults. Mental health is an area that affects us all. Thankfully, we continue to become more aware of how varying levels of mental health issues have an impact not only on those who face them directly, but also ALL those who are connected with people who suffer. And of course, one of the great challenges to our society today is the scourge of cancer - particularly the invasive types including breast cancer - which not only attacks the health of the victim, but also wreaks havoc on a whole variety of additional psychological issues for those affected.

And I must say - we are better because of our growing willingness to address and discuss these topics, rather than shy away from the difficulties they pose. Many of us have had too much personal experience with these and other serious issues. Even as we work hard to overcome, conquer the challenges presented by these and more, may this Shabbat of thanksgiving be a time when we can reflect on the many blessings we do know, even when it's hard for us to see....

Hachnasat Orchim #5 - Sukkot 5773

I sit here listening to Little Jazz practicing Eleanor Rigby and Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds on his trumpet, and I think further of the opportunities for hachnasat orchim - "welcoming of guests" - provided during Sukkot, and year-round.

So today I had the sacred chance to consider how "welcoming" is related to our value of bikkur cholim - visiting the sick...I went to the hospital to visit a member of our congregation (a friend and neighbor too!) who just had a pacemaker implanted yesterday, following a few months of treatment following an M.I. He's doing great, and we actually had a wonderful time discussing some passions we share: Abraham Lincoln, historiography, evolution, psychology of groups, and even the eternal question "Is it good for the Jews."

Though this friend is in great shape, even following a serious episode of helth concern, I am reminded of our ongoing, precious responsibility to take care of ourselves and others. Whether it's now, during Breast Cancer Awareness Month and Mental Health Awareness Month, or any day of any year - we need to be conscious about our efforts to live healthy, fulfilling, intentional lives. 

Just a thought for the fifth eve of Sukkot.

 

Hachnasat Orchim #4 - Sukkot 5773

What a day! Here we are in the middle of Sukkot, it's been drizzling and cold much of the day - and yet my thoughts are of hot sun, great friends, and the best way to build Jewish identity, as registration opened today for OSRUI 2013. We've already made sure our kids are signed up, which is kinda strange as Little Jazz will be attending two full sessions, i.e. the WHOLE summer, and Sister Soul is now old enough to be in Tiferet for 4 weeks. So happy for them. Find out more at www.osrui.org

As well, it was our first day of mid-week Religious School for our 4th-6th graders (maybe it's time to admit fall is here?)...

And, tonight is the first of the presidential candidate debates ("going to the candidates' debate"...Mrs. Robinson, anyone?). Speaking of where have you gone Joe DiMaggio (or Yaz, George Brett, and Cal Ripken for that matter)....

If you know me at all, you know where my loyalties lie for this debate and the upcoming election...hope the prez get's his badass on...should be interesting to observe, throughout....

What are YOU thankful for, now given the chance to reflect? Me? It's all about good partners (see pic above)...

Hachnasat Orchim #3 - Sukkot 5773

Sukkot is a time when we emphasize our sacred tradition of hospitality. Hachnasat Orchim has become a major building block of our culture. 

In a brilliant new book, Wired for Culture: Origins of the Human Social Mind (Norton, 2012), Mark Pagel demonstrates that it has been the development of human culture that has enabled humanity to overcome the "limitations" of our genetics and thrive through obstacles and environmental constraints that have hindered all other species. He writes:

Humans had acquired the ability to learn from others, and to copy, imitate and improve upon their actions. This meant that elements of culture themselves - ideas, languages, beliefs, songs, art, technologies - could act like genes, capable of being transmitted to others and reproduced. But unlike genes, these elements of culture could jump directly from one mind to another, shortcutting the normal genetic routes of transmission. And so our cultures came to define a second great system of inheritance, able to transmit knowledge down the generations.

I think the author is giving a reasoned, scientific representation of what Judaism has called the shalshelet shel kabbalah - the "chain of tradition." How wonderful as we consider the power of tradition - its rituals, symbols, metaphors and meaning - during these festival days. Like all forms of sacred heritage, Pagel argues that "culture" itself is one of the gifts we've received, or developed, as human beings unique among the animals:

Our possession of culture is responsible for our art, music, and religion, our unmatched acts of charity, empathy, and cooperation, our sense of justice, fairness, altruism, and even self-sacrifice;  

And he continues with the important and necessary caveat reminder

but also for our undeniable self-interest, our tendency to favor people from our own ethnic or racial groups, wariness of strangers, xenophobia, and predilections to war...it is why we, and probably we alone, have consciousness, and yet why our conscious mind is often divided between reason and passion...

Considering these fascinating insights on the human condition brings greater sweetness to these days...

 

Hachnasat Orchim #2 - Sukkot 5773

It's the second eve of Sukkot 5773 - and the 1st of October 2012 (see my previous post on "Rosh Chodesh August" and creating meaningful ritual memories). With Sukkot, it usually also means accepting the onset of fall (though, as this #jazzrabbilovessun, I've been expressing to people that I will be holding onto summer until some time during Hanukkah). With the change of seasons also comes the newness and renewed opportunity to share, enjoy and appreciate things that perhaps we haven't, at least since a year before.

And so tonight, I've declared in the jazzkitchen "Pumpkin's Gone Wild!" Haven't enjoyed anything pumpkin at least since last Halloween or Thanksgiving. This evening's festive meal includes pumpkin gnocchi with pumpkin alfredo (omg so good), pumpkin pie, pumpkin ice cream, and even a pumpkin pie martini. Hey, if you're gonna enjoy the season, go crazy/go complete!

Every year I hate saying goodbye to summertime; yet each time around, gradually, I'm learning to enjoy something wonderful about the days yet to come. 

Hachnasat Orchim #1 - Sukkot 5773

Sukkot, the "festival of booths," is known as z'man simchateynu - the time of our rejoicing. It is the predecessor of Thanksgiving, as this fall harvest festival embodies the notion of hoda'ah (thanksgiving) in Jewish tradition. It is also, historically, the inspiration for both Hanukkah (as the Hasmoneans did not have time to celebrate Sukkot during the Maccabean revolt) as well as  for our American holiday of Thanksgiving, as the Pilgrims believed they were re-living the Biblical journey of the Israelites.

And yet to me, the most significant aspect of Sukkot is that it serves as a reminder, teacher, and prompter of the Jewish value of hachnasat orchim - the welcoming of guests. We are taught to invite people to our sukkot, and into our homes, to fulfill the obligations of this festival. Better yet, we learn (and re-learn) that this ultimate sense of hospitality is of course not limited to these days of Sukkot - and that we should be warm, welcoming, and strive to make all people comfortable each and every day of the year - holy day or not.

One further point - these ideas of thanksgiving and hospitality - are so important that our sacred literature refers to this time as he-chag - THE festival, truly par excellence through most of Jewish history. What are YOU doing to celebrate this joyous time? More so, how are you cultivating your hospitality toward others in this New Year?

CHAG SUKKOT SAMEYACH - wishing you a very happy holiday!

 

Kol Nidrei 5773

ELOHAI N’TZOR L’SHONI MEYRA US’FATAI MIDABER MIRMA
My God, guard my speech from evil and my lips from deception.

Through the long hot weeks of this past summer, I intended on this night to address the savage breakdown of interpersonal discourse that has pervaded our world.  Politicians, public officials, journalists and yes, private citizens have lost sight of (or neglected) the value and significance of respectful interchange.  As we have witnessed this erosion of respect between people – particularly and especially when they differ – so too have we been subject to the dismissal of some of the fundamental building blocks of American society and our sacred Jewish tradition.
In has masterful work Revolt of the Elites, Christopher Lasch reminds us that “democracy requires a vigorous exchange of ideas and opinions. Ideas, like property, need to be distributed as widely as possible.” And yet, when we forego the expectation that our dialogue and debate are necessarily imbues with dignity, compassion and patience, we learn (as Lasch writes) that “democratic debate degenerates all too easily into a shouting match in which the voice of reason seldom makes itself heard.”
So – I’ve been reading and studying, collecting illustrations of this tragic change in our perspective regarding how we treat and deal with others, publicly and privately. For example, another recent work – The Voting Wars by Richard Hasen – outlines how this dramatic shift in interpersonal behavior has led to such outcomes as fraud, voter suppression and intimidation, and even lying about citizenship and eligibility to register in the electoral process. As you well know, all you have to do is open up the paper, listen to the radio, or watch TV in order to be exposed to this unhealthy and often unethical conduct. Right?
Unfortunately, bullying and bigotry, hatred and deceit, nastiness and nosiness are not limited to the realm of public media. And that’s where the real trouble is. Listen to banter in the school yard and the classroom, around the work place and out in restaurants. Consider the demeanor among young people, and more than ever among adults. We can easily find less than exemplary treatment by one person of another. I dare say we might even recognize these experiences in our home and private lives.
From words of Torah we are taught that ALL people are created in the Divine image; to love our neighbor as ourselves; and that our responsibility is to pursue justice and make peace. How is it that our society has jeopardized these basic, yet powerful possibilities of the human condition? One response, again according to Lasch: “Trust in life carries the risk of disappointment, so we inoculate ourselves with irreverence.” Perhaps we’ve become so generally distrusting of one another that we only know how to protect our frailties through disrespect – i.e. “do unto others before they do unto you.” But I don’t buy this. As human beings, as Jews, we must cultivate a greater sense of hope in our human potential – to be kind (and kinder), to be generous and giving, to be compassionate and caring, and simply nice. Of course, this outlook is challenged, even attacked, every day. Yet I am buoyed by what we used to read in the Gates of Prayer: some are guilty, all are responsible.
On this very day, let us acknowledge that WE are responsible to improve and repair this situation. Truly, some of us, maybe all of us, are guilty to some extent in allowing an atmosphere in which lousy, rude and negative behavior is condoned, tolerated, unchecked. OK, we’re not all, nor always, lying, nasty and difficult. Yet there are times when we haven’t stood up for someone in need, defended someone from unwarranted gossip or slander, or when we’ve ignored malice aimed at someone else, simply because it was more convenient, or easier, to look away, to “not get involved.”
No matter how complicit we have been in getting our society to this point, we are ALL responsible, together, to address it, beginning of course, with ourselves. Let’s take a moment to look at the very book in front of us. If we can’t pay attention to the words right here, what are we here for anyway? Please open to page 326:
Help me then, O God; help me always, but especially now, on this sacred Day of Atonement; help me to banish from myself whatever is mean, ugly, callous, cruel, stubborn, or otherwise unworthy of a being created in Your image. Purify me, revive me, uplift me. Forgive my past, and lead me into the future, resolved to be your servant.
And just what does it mean to be God’s servant? That’s truly a tough question. On this day, in this season, as we look to become better versions of ourselves, as we strive to work together to make our world a better place, the idea of being God’s servant is summed up, in part, with the words of Al CHEYT, our listing of wrongdoings and pledges to do better:
We sin against You when we sin against ourselves. For our failures of truth, O Lord, we ask forgiveness. For passing judgment without knowledge of the facts, and for distorting facts to fit our theories. For deceiving ourselves and others with half-truths, an dfor pretending to emotions we do not feel. For using the sins of others to excuse our own, and for denying responsibility for our own misfortunes. For condemning in our children the faults we tolerate in ourselves, and for condemning in our parents the faults we tolerate in ourselves. Teach us to forgive ourselves for all these sins, O forgiving God, and help us to overcome them.
Then perhaps we can rebuild and enhance trust, respect, dignity, pleasantness and politeness throughout our community, and the wider society beyond.
As rendered in our Mishkan T’fila:
ELOHAI N’TZOR L’SHONI MEYRA US’FATAI MIDABER MIRMA
My God, guard my speech from evil and my lips from deception. Before those who slander me, I will hold my tongue, I will practice humility. Open my heart to Your Torah, that I may purse Your mitzvot. As for all who think evil of me, cancel their designs and frustrate their schemes. Act for Your own sake, for the sake of Your Power, for the sake of Your Holiness, for the sake of Your Torah; so that Your loved ones may be rescued, save with Your power, and answer me.

#ElulPledge carries over into New Year

Well, been too busy to post anything here - but have been trying to keep up on the "resolution" made at the beginning of Elul: to continue working myself into the best physical shape of my adult life.
Thanks to regular exercise and a couple workouts a week with our trainer, I think I'm getting there. It's a pain, I enjoy it, and the benefits are of course remarkable.
And what does this continue to say about the bigger picture of life? That in order to really take care of ourselves, the effort cannot be limited to bursts of time short segments; the commitment to do anything, be anything, and do it well has to be an ONGOING life-long practice. Just as with exercise, so too with study, professional development, and especially honing the skills that cultivate positive relationships.
Well, off to do some more crazy style pushups...or maybe read a good book :)

Elul 4: "Sunrise, Sunset"? Well, no sunset yet in N. IN

Elul 4: Today the kids started school for the year: Little Jazz in 8th grade, Sister Soul in 6th - both in middle school.  How the heck did this happen?

It's been a beautiful sunny 85 degree day here in N. Indiana - just doesn't seem to fit with "back to school" for this New England native. More so, it's making it harder to wrap my head around the idea of really getting ready for the Holy Days. And yet, that's the point. We can't really "get ready" to celebrate the New Year, to "prepare" for teshuva, or to gear up for the cycle of these yamim nora'im. Rather, we have to accept them as they mark a moment in the ongoing *process* of living a Jewish life, embracing what it means to be a human being, fully, with all of its ups and down, and the baggage we all collect along the way.

Just be careful about the baggage you pack as you continue your journey :)

Elul is gonna be long

Elul 2: UGH! So much to do, so much to gather, coordinate, plan, pull together....sometimes it just doesn't happen the way you hope, sometimes it just doesn't happen at all....man plans, God laughs....
At least we got Ben's hair cut before school starts....and again, beginning this Wednesday? Really? It's still August....I remember many summers coming home from camp later than this....aaaaah, the good ol' Midwest, where our calendars are informed by corn and harvest (ummm?)....
Anyway - had a good talk about the status of the movement - and my trepidation about its state of affairs....nothing new there though...
Well, at least red beans'n'rice (oh so nice - thanks Kermit Ruffins) can cure almost any road block....
...the great thing about the process - there's always tomorrow...
 

#elulpledge begins with wishes of Eid Mubarak, nice

Elul 1: first day of my Elul pledge, got to the gym - unusual for a Sunday, but a nice way to begin the new month.

Today is Eid al-Fitr - so as we enter the Jewish month of preparation for the Yamim Nora'im, it is absolutely appropriate to wish our Muslim brothers and sisters sweetness as they conclude the observance of Ramadan.

To them, and for all of us, we join in saying "Eid Mubarak" - wishing a blessed celebration.

New Year's resolution 5773: a pledge for Elul

This coming Shabbat coincides with Rosh Chodesh Elul - beginning the Hebrew month in which we "prepare" for the onset of the New Year. Yeah, like you can really just pick up and "get ready" for the Yamim Nora'im - the Days of Awe - if you haven't been in tune with the rhythm of Jewish time throughout the year (but that's a rant for another time).
So I'm thinking that this is as good a time as any to set my personal wheels in motion for this month of spiritual reflection and readying - that is, to make my own "Elul pledge." And here it is:
This summer has been a fantastic, dizzying, busy, hectic and over-scheduled time (not unlike most of the year). I have really slacked on my usual exercise habits. Not that I haven't been physically active, I'm just missing the benefits of daily trips to the gym and regular workouts with a trainer (and I can feel it). 
Over this coming month, as the Jewish world looks toward the Holy Days, as our children return to school, and as much of our programming kicks back into gear - my pledge is to enter the New Year in the best physical shape I can. For many of us, bodily exercise is a spiritual endeavor; for some, it is the most meaningful "ritual" or religious activity in which we engage. And as is proven over and over, healthy/active/fit bodies support emotional, spiritual, and physical health overall.
SO - as Elul is upon us - what's YOUR Elul pledge. Would love to know. And feel free to share #Elulpledge.

"Rosh Chodesh August" - another pearl from my camp exploits

It's August 1st - a long time ago, summer of '83 to be exact, while studying in "Judaica" with our counselor (now Rabbi) Charles Arian, exploring the idea of what it takes to "make" sacred time - my dearest friend Corey Cutler and I suggest that we create a holiday that would *only* be observed at camp: voila, "Rosh Chodesh August." With only a few days of prep time to introduce this new-fangled Jewish tradition, we tried to come up with a few rituals specific to the day. Well, I recall we might have sang something, and we (Charles, Corey, myself) definitely wore bathrobes to dinner - not such a surprise for us in those days, being half lazy teenagers and half devotees of M*A*S*H.
Though a silly experience - it has certainly stuck with me...yet another profound way in which my Jewish learning was enhanced and imprinted because of something at camp. To this day, whenever I teach students about what elements frame a holiday, I refer to an experiment by 16 year olds to sanctify the beginning of this month. And thankfully, it works every time.

Something for everyone - every kid shines through Reform Jewish camping

Reform Jewish summer camping has something for everyone: from Judaica and sports to aquatics and hiking to nature and the arts – the programs offered at the URJ camps provide the opportunity for every one of our children to be enriched and flourish in a safe, nurturing, inclusive environment in which they can expand and express their Jewish identity.
I am privileged once again to serve on faculty for Tiferet at OSRUI. Tiferet, the arts unit, is one of the unique programs offered by camp (along with Chalutzim – the Hebrew immersion session and Tour L’Agam – a biking tour around Lake Michigan, both for entering 10th – 12th graders). For twenty years now, Tiferet has enabled artistic Jewish youngsters to engage such creative areas as music, dance, drama, media and visual arts to explore topics and texts from our sacred tradition; as the campers use their talents to breathe innovative and improvisational life into their work, so too do these young Jews draw rich, long-lasting meaning from the experiences they share.
This session, our theme is Midrash Rabbah – for which we are using the great Jewish process of midrash (interpretation and investigation) to address the stories from Genesis. In four studios – dance, drama, music and visual arts (which serve as the campers’ “major” for the session), we have tackled diverse and important ideas like the conflicts in Abraham’s life; the voices that are “missing” from the narratives; Jacob’s ladder and his subsequent wrestling match with God/angel/himself; and Joseph’s journey from young dreamer to dream interpreter whose wit saves all from treacherous famine (and these were just this week!). We have taken our texts and pulled them apart to search their meaning for the values they teach. More so, we have used these teaching to inspire acting, movement, lyrics, notes and design. Tiferet is blessed to be guided by absolutely gifted moomchim (specialists) whose professional talents are matched by their care for the students, along with fabulous staff of dedicated madrichim (counselors).
I have long believed that summer camp is the very best tool for Jewish living and learning that our Reform movement sponsors. I was fortunate to have the chance to grow up in the Reform camp community, which gave me the gifts of confidence in myself and passion for progressive Judaism. As a camper, staff member, and now faculty, I have witnessed the power of camp in cultivating caring, committed, knowledgeable Jews. More so, camp allows each child, each adult, the opportunity to live up to his or her promise as b’tzelem elohim – being fashioned in the Divine image. Each of our children deserves this opportunity, one that camping provides like nowhere else.
Like every worthy endeavor, Reform Jewish camping needs our ongoing support: send your children (and grandchildren) to our camps; ask your congregation how it participates in maintaining these programs; contribute to the camper scholarship fund at your synagogue or one of the URJ camps; be an advocate for camp by promoting its possibilities for every Jewish child.
Camp has something for everyone. I hope you will join me in continuing to sustain this vital cause.

A thought for Super Sammy, and his beloved family

As long as I can remember - camp has been monumentally important to me....my closest friends, my fondest memories, my greatest experiences (as a child and as an adult and Jewish professional) have developed as an extension of my involvement with URJ-sponsored Jewish camping.
And this week has been the greatest gift: though I don't go up to OSRUI for another 10 days to serve on faculty, our segel *family* has proven to be a most wonderful, sacred, tight-knit community as it has reached out to provide support for one of our youngest beloved member Sammy Sommer (son of my dear friends Phyllis and Michael) who was recently diagnosed with leukemia. 
We all have great expectations for his complete conquering of this situation; more so, this has been a very powerful opportunity not only to support the family, yet also to raise awareness of such disease within our greater Jewish community and beyond.
Strange as it may seem because of circumstance, I feel blessed to be part of this *kehillah kedosha* particularly at this time.

Super Sammy - I know you will kick the stuffing out of this disease...and continue being a blessing to all of us who know and love you!

The desert can be like dessert

Had a great weekend in Santa Fe for Alana and Joel's wedding. The entire time was spectacular - all the events were wonderful, the weather was perfect, the people great, gracious, loving and fun...and the "down time" wandering the shops and streets couldn't have been better. Man, I love the desert southwest.

Be your own thinktank

Recently my Tuesday afternoon "Ethics Exploration" class - adults committed to life-long learning and the value of being part of a Reform congregational community - engaged a new module published by the URJ. It's called Arba Kushiyot: Four Questions to Ponder about the Future of Reform Judaism. This project came out of the "Reform Jewish Think Tank", a joint effort of the URJ, CCAR, and HUC-JIR (and can be found at http://urj.org/learning/my/journeys/).
In four very well-scripted lessons, the participants address 1. What is the greatest contribution of Reform Judaism to Judaism? 2. Why are you a Reform Jew? 3. What is the greatest challenge of Reform Judaism? and 4. What will facilitate the growth of Reform Judaism? Accompanying each question/lesson is a brief video snippet showing responses to these items from a variety of people from across the movement, including congregational rabbis, academics, professional leaders (rabbinical, educational, cantorial), and lay personnel as well. The videos are absolutely fascinating and well-done; the only greater element of our use of these materials were the thoughtful, thought-provoking conversations that emerged within our group.
For us, a few key themes kept repeating themselves, no matter where we tried to steer our discussions. First, that the importance of Reform is that the (Jewish) world needs a place for the vibrant presence of progressive Jewish values to be active and thriving - such as our dedication to inclusion and inclusiveness, a broad and open-minded world-view, and upholding the common humanity of all people. Then we seemed to note the importance of an ongoing acceptance of change, evolution, and experimentation with Jewish practice, even as we hold onto the timeless aspects of our tradition. Finally, and overwhelmingly, our entire group expressed an understanding that Reform Judaism (and the entire human endeavor, for that matter) is about creating opportunities for enhancing our lives through meaningful relationships and connection...
I don't know who else has used this wonderful module so far, yet I'm DELIGHTED and PROUD that we did. Yasher koach (great job!) to its creators. May all of our communities be granted the strength and opening to ask, reflect, and respond in their own meaningful ways...

A few years ago I commented on Stuart Brown's wonderful book Play and how we all have to remember how meaningful play, playfulness and fun can/need to be in our lives. Now I'm reading the recently published Lip Service by Marianne LaFrance, in which she explores the psychology, biology, and social intricacies of one of the most common of our human behaviors, the smile.

From the shy glance to the $#!t-eating grin, there is a great deal of science behind how, when, and why we smile. It's fascinating stuff - and ultimately, who cares! What I want to know is what makes YOU smile? Go on, make my day...

Riding the Underground Railroad to the Passover Seder

Today, April 6, 2012, is the 150^th anniversary of the Battle of Shiloh, the first “great and terrible” battle of the Civil War. (In his new book, Shiloh, 1862, author Winston Groom examines how this battle, which “solved nothing, gained nothing, proved nothing” was a turning point for how military and political leaders understood the gravity of the war, and the unfathomable casualties that would follow).

Tonight is also the beginning of Passover, the celebration of Israelite freedom from Egyptian slavery and the perpetual Jewish hope to bring redemption to all who are oppressed, wherever they may be. For this reason, we refer to this season as z’man chereteynu – the “time of our freedom.”

There have always been parallels drawn between the experience of the ancient Israelites at the hands of Pharaoh and that of the African slaves here in the U.S. This is poignantly shown at Passover, especially while sharing the narratives during the seder itself.

This Passover, the compelling analogies have taken on an even greater significance: during this past week while in Cincinnati, I visited the National Underground Railroad Freedom Center (www.freedomcenter.org); this fascinating museum chronicles the history of the Underground Railroad and teaches once again how the effort to abolish slavery in this country was among the greatest accomplishments ever undertaken by our forebears, and yet its challenges still saddle our society today. This visit was so powerful as I went with my children – who have reached the point of being able to understand and appreciate the profound meaning of our past, as well as to personalize its questions. As the Haggadah demands: “in each generation a person must consider himself as if personally freed from Egypt.”

Driving home from the Queen City, we listened to an NPR interview with Winston Groom. During the conversation, I understood something clearly for the first time (a surprise to this rabid student of American history). It has long been evident that the Civil War remains the most vital episode in our nation’s development – as this period brought an end to slavery, further coalesced the country as a United States, and also brought to light key issues (racism, sexism, economic disparity, etc.) that plague us to this day. As Groom spoke, I finally “got” why this topic resonates so dearly with so many of us: the Civil War and its origins and outcome is certainly a most imperfect time in our history. Its lessons are best told through narratives, which just like those in the book of Genesis, allows us to relate to people in a different time and situation because of our common humanity. These accounts – mythical or historical – become real and important as they echo in our hearts and minds.

Bernard Malamud said that the purpose of freedom is to create it for others. In this season of renewal, may the stories of freedom’s struggle inspire us to bring emancipation to all, no matter what their chains.